I: 001
2nd draft (nov. 28, 2005, 10 PM):half-shoveled driveway --
we warm our hands
over the turkey soup
original version:
half-shoveled driveway --
steaming turkey soup
warms our hands
posted by david giacalone @ 2:39 PM
Sunday, November 27, 2005
original version:
About Me
- Name: david giacalone
- Location: United States
. haiku advocate trying to keep a Beginner's Mind ... former lawyer-mediator...... editor of f/k/a weblog ... Born 1949, but a few body parts occasionally feel much younger.. . . a/k/a dagosan
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2 Comments:
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I like the the second one better. The sounds flow just a little bit better, I think.
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